Lola's Birth Story

I can't believe she is here and that I finally get to hold our baby girl. Her name is........

Lola Mitsuko Scoville
Born: September 23, 2014
Weight: 7lbs 1.4oz
Length: 20 in.

I have been wanting to write about Lola's birth story. Over this past weekend, we were really looking forward to Monday because P had a Dr. appt and the dr would check P to see if she was ready to be induced. I had an overwhelming feeling that she was coming in the next couple of days and so I thought the dr would certainly give her the go ahead for induction on Tuesday. Well, she went into the Dr. at 10:45am and she had not dilated or thinned out and so the dr told P to come back on Thursday and they will check again.  I also have to add that I could feel Lola coming and so I woke up super early on Monday morning and started mopping floors and cleaning anything I could. I got Lola's diaper bag ready and was just trying to get things organized. Well, 4:30pm comes around and I was ironing Lola's dresses and I get a text from our amazing friend Stephanie (who P is staying with and has been an absolute angel) that P's water just broke and that they were headed to the hospital. I was so excited that I'm guessing I just ran around the house like a crazy person because Reese and Nora were running around the house in their diaper and underwear just screaming and laughing. Reese was running and yelling, "Lola is coming, Lola is coming. We're going to be late. Ahhhhh. Lola is coming. We're going to be late." Nora was running and screaming, "Lola, Lola, Lola." It was actually pretty hilarious.
I dropped the girls off at their grandparents and then hurried to the hospital. The nurses had to make sure that her water had actually broke, before they could call the dr. I guess some people mistake peeing their pants for their water breaking. Who knew????? I just stayed outside the Labor and Delivery room while Stephanie came out and would give me updates. P's water had broke, but she was completely closed. We were at the hospital for about 2 hours when P was started on pitocin. Nothing happened for a while and so we just waited. We didn't want to miss anything and so we just waited in the lobby. The nurses told us it would be a while and so the nurses got us a room we could stay in. Stephanie would give us updates on P and how close her contractions were. She would send us audio clips of Lola's heartbeat which was so nice to feel a part of what was going on. Around 12:00am, the nurses told us that we should go back to our room and get some rest because P wouldn't deliver for a while. I didn't realize that when she said a while, she meant almost 17 hours later. We felt so bad that we couldn't do anything to help P and Stephanie was taking care of her and they were both so tired so we did what anyone would do...... We went to the grocery store at 2:00am to go buy P some candy for an after delivery snack. We finally went to bed around 3:00am and Stephanie would give us updates through the night. Yes! Stephanie is amazing! We got up at 7:00am and P was 5cm and I believe 70% effaced. She was slowly making progress and around 2:00pm, P was a 7 and 90 effaced. She was ready to deliver around 3:30p, but by then 2 more urgent deliveries were put ahead of P. The dr came in around 4:30pm and I was able to go in with also for the delivery. I just have to say what an honor this was. I have never been able to be there for my girl's deliveries and so I felt so lucky to be there. P was amazing and Stephanie was the perfect coach and Lola was born at 4:51PM. P had been in labor for over 24 hours. She came out with lots of hair and perfect. P did not want Lola placed on her and so we made sure that the nurses knew. She actually wanted Lola to be taken out of the room as quickly as possible. The nurses kind of took a long time cleaning Lola off and checking and weighing her. The dr was doing a great job at helping to distract P and I just kept looking over to see if she was okay while wanting to hold our sweet baby. The nurses were giving me hugs and telling me congratulations while I was still in the room with P and I just started to tear up. I looked at her one last time before leaving the room and she just gave me the biggest smile. I was finally okay to leave with Lola to the nursery. The nurse told me that she needed to take Lola to the nursery and that they were in the middle of report so it would be about 20 minutes before I would be able to hold Lola. I was just looking at her through the nursery window trying to hold it together, when I could n't keep it in anymore. I felt so bad for P. I almost felt like I couldn't be excited while knowing what P was about to go through. I realized that I had never seen Reese's or Nora's birth mother at the hospital and I just had so much empathy. I couldn't hold in the tears anymore and started crying in hysterics. I'm talking hyperventilating, snot nose, can't talk, blood shot eyes, crying. I didn't want anyone to see me and so I ran to our room as fast as I could to let it out. One of the nurses stopped me and asked if I was okay. I couldn't even talk , but tried to say, "I just feel so bad". I then continued to run to my room. My mom had showed up unexpectedly and I she tried to talk to me, but I just had to get to my room before I completely lost it. I just ran to my room and shut the door and sobbed for a good 10 minutes and prayed. Once I had a good talk with Heavenly Father and He reminded me that Lola is supposed to come to our family, I was able to compose myself ( although I still had blood shot devil eyes) and be excited to finally hold our baby girl.  Ron and I were able to give Lola her first bath, and pick out her first bow, and just be together with our perfect baby. We finally were able to take her back to our room and just be together and give her her first bottle. She really is so beautiful. Reese and Nora were able to come up and meet their new little sister a couple hours later and were completely in love. Nora came in and pointed and yelled, "baby". 

Reese, just loved rubbing Lola's back. These three are going to be 3 peas in a pod. When we were sitting there with our little family, I was filled with gratitude and love. I am so grateful for these 3 precious children that Heavenly Father has sent to us and entrusted us to love, teach, and raise. I just sat there hugging my girls and feeling so grateful for the opportunity to be their mother. They are such special girls and the spirit shines bright in their eyes. I just want to do my best everyday to never let that light fade. I hope I can raise these girls so that they know that they are daughters of their Heavenly Father.  

So we are so excited for our new baby girl, but on Tuesday night, P started holding Lola a lot more, which she wasn't planning on doing. She was planning on relinquishing her rights around 5:00pm on Wednesday night, but she was having a difficult time when the attorney was there. The attorney brought up that P was having a difficult time and brought up a temporary foster care in which Lola would come to our home without P signing. As soon as I heard this I just started bawling. I don't know how we had ended up in this situation for a second time, but my greatest fear with adoption had come true and I was re-living all the pain and fears that we experienced with our first failed placement.  I had Lola in our room and was just rocking Lola as she slept and knowing that P was going to sign soon, I just started praying. It was interesting how I started praying that P would have the strength to relinquish her rights, I prayed that Stephanie, the attorney, the paralegal, and Ron and I would be guided by the spirit to know what to say to help P sign.I remember asking, " Heavenly Father, I don't know if I am been obedient enough or done enough to bring down the powers of heaven, but if I have, please bring down the powers of heaven and help P to relinquish.  I was in the room and just waiting to hear what happened and so I just continued to pray. It was interesting how my prayers had changed from asking for help, to being grateful for all the people that had helped to bring baby Lola to us, to "Father, whatever is thy will, I will do. Even if it means giving up this precious baby girl in my arms that I have felt coming for 8 months." I realized that I had been praying for almost 30 minutes and I have to admit that I have not prayed that long for quite a while. I felt so bad that it took something like this for me to take the time to talk to Heavenly Father for that long. After a while I was asked to go down to P's room. I have to add that P needed to be off pain killers for 5 hours before signing legal papers. She kept stalling and then a nurse came out with her claws and told us how she needed food, needed pain medication, and needed to rest and she wasn't signing any papers tonight. I was seriously livid. The attorney had Ron and I come in and just talk to P. We all cried and she knew that she needed to place Lola with us. She told the attorney that as soon as we walked in the room, she knew what she needed to do. She was ready to sign, but because the nurse brought her a Percocet about 5 minutes earlier, she could not sign the papers. We reassured P that we loved her and that we love and will take good care of Lola. We want her to be happy and go back to school and attain all the goals that she has made. The attorney told us that when we are around she knows what she needs to do. P was advised not to hold Lola during the night and she was going to just take an ambien and go to bed and get some rest so she would be able to sign papers the next morning around 10:30pm. I was going to stay at the hospital that night with Lola, but I and Ron knew that I wouldn't be able to handle the stresses that were coming if P decided to continue to hold Lola during the night. I was already an emotional wreck and had cried more in the past 2 days than I had in the past 10 years of my life. Also, because of our first failed placement in which we had the same scenario, I was so scared to bond even more with Lola if she was not coming home with us. So Ron stayed again at the hospital and I went home to my girls who were emotionally spent. I hugged them a little tighter that night and let them sleep in my bed with me.