Happy 6th Birthday to my Sweet Reesie!!
Monday, March 27, 2017
Happy 6th Birthday Reesie!
Tuesday, February 14, 2017
Sunday, February 5, 2017
Miracle upon Miracle
I have been trying to find a way to write all the miracles that have occurred in the past couple of weeks and all of the prayers answered so that the twins could come to our family. To be truthful, it is absolutely overwhelming to me to try to write about everything that has happened. My main purpose in wanting to write all this is to write about the goodness of God. To write about how merciful and loving our Father in Heaven is. In trying to write everything though, I feel completely inadequate because with all of the miracles that occurred, I know there are probably hundreds of other miracles that occurred that I am not even aware of. I have had so many spiritual experiences during the past 4 months that have been powerful. I am going to paste some of the experiences I have had lately.
jan 10. 2017
jan 10. 2017
Today has been a very difficult and yet a faith filled day. We had court this morning at 10:30am in Pennsylvania. Ron left yesterday right after partaking of the sacrament. He slipped out and as he looked back at me, I wanted to cry. He was about in tears as he walked out the door. Ron started his fast on Saturday night and fasted all Sunday, and most of Monday. He truly knows how to bring down the power of God and I'm so grateful for the wonderful man he is. I fasted yesterday morning and also this morning. I knew that Heavenly Father was with us and that we were in his hands. This morning, Ron met Jay and they went to court. Ron said that the birth father showed up to court without an attorney again and the judge appointed Keffe an attorney. Keffe had said that he couldn't afford an attorney because he had bought his other kids gift for Christmas and he forgot about court. It all sounded like there were lies everywhere, but ultimately, the judge appointed Keffe an attorney and pushed court back to Jan 25th. No one even had a chance to testify and we felt like Ron flew out to Pennsylvania for nothing. Everyone was infuriated with the judges decision. One good thing that happened is that we were able to change the statute that they are trying to terminate the birth father's rights. There are now 2 charges against Keffe now that the judge can terminate his rights. We were all very discouraged, but then Ron went to see the twins and everything changed. At one point after court, I was praying to know if we should keep moving forward. When Ron got to the Corfee's home, we face timed and I received my answer. As I watched Ron with the babies, I knew he is supposed to be their dad and that they are supposed to come to our family. I had absolutely no doubts about if these babies are meant for our family. They are the perfect completion to our family. I loved watching Ron with the Corfee boys as well. Because of the stress of Keffe, the Corfee's didn't feel comfortable or safe keeping the babies in their home any longer. I completely understood their fears. After trying to find a place for the twins to go for a few hours, Genesha felt so stuck and hopeless. She didn't have anyone to watch the twins. Ron called me and said the Corfee's decided to care for the babies until the 25th. This was such an act of love and sacrifice. My heart was so full of love and gratitude because of the Corfee's sacrifice they made for our family. Although, things had seem to be falling apart earlier, I felt somehow someway, Heavenly Father was preparing things so that we could adopt the twins. Jay thought the judge might have did what she did so that there was no way that Keffe could appeal the judges decision later on.
Jan 23, 2017
Today I started having a lot of anxiety about Ron going out to court in Pennsylvania. Which led to anxiety about all of us being in Pennsylvania. Reese has also been dealing with separation anxiety and I have started to feel a lot of guilt because of the stress she has had to deal with. I finally decided to pray about it and ask Heavenly Father if Ton should fly out to Pennsylvania to go to court. I poured out my heart to Heavenly Father and told him how scared I was for my family. How scared I was that something would happen to Ron, myself, Stephanie, or leaving our kids without a parent. I asked him to please let us know if we were making the right decision. At this point I was crying because I can't stand the thought of anything happening to our family or Stephanie. I then closed my prayer and started to read D&C 8-9.
D&C 9: 14
"Stand fast in the work wherewith I have called you, and a hair of your head shall not be lost, and you shall be lifted up at the last day. Amen."
I started bawling as I read this verse. It was a complete answer to my prayers and the feelings in my heart were that of the Holy Ghost and I knew that God could not lie. I knew that He was telling me that not only will I protect your family, but not even a hair of their head will be lost. He truly knows the desires of our hearts. He knows the end from the beginning and He knew exactly what I needed to hear before Ron flew out to Pennsylvania. I thought about this scripture before Ron left, before I left, while we were there, and even while we have been home. Heavenly Father has been involved the entire time and He will protect us.
January 28th 2017
I Amon the plane coming home from Philadelphia and as I read this verse, I am reminded of all the feelings I felt yesterday as I was running and reading my scriptures. I was going through all these verses yesterday and praying as I went through all the things to pray for. As I prayed for Mercy, I told Heavenly Father, I know I have asked so much o you lately and I am so grateful, but knowing you are a merciful God, if there is any way to help us go home quickly so we can be safe and unite as a family, please help this to happen. I wouldn't ask this if I wasn't scared, but I am and that I why I ask this.. in the name of Jesus Christ amen. A few hours later, I was telling Stephanie about my prayer, but also told her that I knew it wasn't possible because Utah needed to receive the paper ICPC papers. Later on that night, Ron called me and told me that Genevieve had pushed and called Utah and told them about the situation and how long we had been waiting and utah ICPC made an exception and we were cleared to come home. This was an absolute miracle. I have no doubt in my mind that Heavenly Father made this happen. There is no other way. He is truly a merciful God!
18 Yea, cry unto him for mercy; for he is mighty to save.
19 Yea, humble yourselves, and continue in prayer unto him.
20 Cry unto him when ye are in your fields, yea, over all your flocks.
21 Cry unto him in your houses, yea, over all your household, both morning, mid-day, and evening.
22 Yea, cry unto him against the power of your enemies.
23 Yea, cry unto him against the devil, who is an enemy to all righteousness.
24 Cry unto him over the crops of your fields, that ye may prosper in them.
25 Cry over the flocks of your fields, that they may increase.
26 But this is not all; ye must pour out your souls in your closets, and your secret places, and in your wilderness.
27 Yea, and when you do not cry unto the Lord, let your hearts be full, drawn out in prayer unto him continually for your welfare, and also for the welfare of those who are around you.
I Amon the plane coming home from Philadelphia and as I read this verse, I am reminded of all the feelings I felt yesterday as I was running and reading my scriptures. I was going through all these verses yesterday and praying as I went through all the things to pray for. As I prayed for Mercy, I told Heavenly Father, I know I have asked so much o you lately and I am so grateful, but knowing you are a merciful God, if there is any way to help us go home quickly so we can be safe and unite as a family, please help this to happen. I wouldn't ask this if I wasn't scared, but I am and that I why I ask this.. in the name of Jesus Christ amen. A few hours later, I was telling Stephanie about my prayer, but also told her that I knew it wasn't possible because Utah needed to receive the paper ICPC papers. Later on that night, Ron called me and told me that Genevieve had pushed and called Utah and told them about the situation and how long we had been waiting and utah ICPC made an exception and we were cleared to come home. This was an absolute miracle. I have no doubt in my mind that Heavenly Father made this happen. There is no other way. He is truly a merciful God!
18 Yea, cry unto him for mercy; for he is mighty to save.
19 Yea, humble yourselves, and continue in prayer unto him.
20 Cry unto him when ye are in your fields, yea, over all your flocks.
21 Cry unto him in your houses, yea, over all your household, both morning, mid-day, and evening.
22 Yea, cry unto him against the power of your enemies.
23 Yea, cry unto him against the devil, who is an enemy to all righteousness.
24 Cry unto him over the crops of your fields, that ye may prosper in them.
25 Cry over the flocks of your fields, that they may increase.
26 But this is not all; ye must pour out your souls in your closets, and your secret places, and in your wilderness.
27 Yea, and when you do not cry unto the Lord, let your hearts be full, drawn out in prayer unto him continually for your welfare, and also for the welfare of those who are around you.
My testimony has been strengthened so much in many different things. My testimony has been strengthened in Heavenly angels and that they are a powerful force to access heavenly help throughout our life. They are part of the grace that is available through the atonement. Because of what I felt when I had the experience and knowing that our ancestors are here to help, I knew that angels would be in the courtroom. I knew it! After Ron told me everything that happened in court and how the judge handled things, I knew even more that angels were in the courtroom. What I didn't realize is that they were with us the entire time and making sure we made it home safely. One of the ways that Heavenly Father protected us is through his angels. Angels were truly there round about to protect us and make sure that" not a hair of our head would be lost." I know that they are still doing that. I am so grateful for these experiences that strengthnen my testimony and teach me about the things of eternity.
Sunday, January 22, 2017
Christmas Eve 2016
Christmas Eve is something I always look forward to. We always go over to Ron's parent's house around 4:00PM for a nice prime rib dinner. After dinner, we go downstairs and the kids play the bells to Christmas songs, we sing Christmas hymns, the kids act out the nativity story as Grandpa reads Luke 2, Ron reads "How the Grinch Stole Christmas" in his best Grinchy voice, and Grandpa reads "Twas the night before Christmas". It is a wonderful night full of the Spirit, fun, and family. When we get home from Grandma and Grandpa's house, the kids change into their pajamas and we put out milk and cookies for Santa. After the kids got all ready for bed, they received an unexpected guest. Scott and Jack were on our front porch with gifts from Santa. He always brings the shutterfly books that I make for them and then we read them together before we go to bed that night. After we put the kids to bed, we got busy pulling out gifts from Santa and finished getting the stockings ready. I have to say that this is one of the first years in a long time that I actually felt like I went to go to bed at a decent hour. I think last year, I was up late putting together a dollhouse. The year before, I was up until 4:00am putting together a kitchen. So it was really nice when Ron and I could have Christmas ready by 11:00pm and watch something together for a little while. (We don't go to bed before midnight. Although, I really should;) I have to admit that with all the stress that has been going on during the month of December, I shopped more than usual for the kids. Retail therapy is a real thing. I also felt so bad that the kids had to go through all of the disappointments of the twins not being here for Christmas that I ended up buying them more stuff. ha ha! Yeah, I know you can't buy there love, but at least it made me feel better. Anyway, I was excited for the kids to wake up on Christmas morning.
Thursday, January 12, 2017
What mercies has He bestowed upon me?
Today I had some pretty powerful experiences that I feel like I need to write down so that I will always remember. This morning I woke up early to run and started off by praying. Yesterday, Reese had a rough day and I was losing my patience and yelled at her. I still felt bad this morning even after repenting last night. I was repenting again and thinking how much I need the spirit in my life right now. How much do I need to hear my Heavenly Father's voice. I remember thinking that I cannot be doing anything that makes me lose the spirit because I need His guidance more than ever. After praying, I started to read my scriptures. I am in Alma 33 and in v.16, it reads, ".......because they will not understand thy mercies which thou hast bestowed upon them because of thy Son." After reading this verse, I thought to myself, "What mercies has he bestowed upon me during our adoption effort?'
Here are a few of the things that came to mind.....
- Genesha contacting us
-Finding Jay
-Getting to be with the twins for a week in Pa
-Words spoken with Genesha at Jay's office
-Getting flights home so quickly
-My kids and ron at the airport
-Jay calling and finding a way to terminate Keffe's rights
- Steph and Nick
-Easing the concerns and tensions of Genesha
-Statute appealed
-Ron seeing the twins and spending the day with the Corfee family
-Steph and Nick deciding to care for the twins for 2 more weeks
- Easing Genesha's worries
I then started to think about how Ron and I needed to go on a date night and that we should go to the temple tomorrow. I remembered that Stephanie had given me a name back and I started to wonder if we could do a sealing tomorrow. I logged in to FamilySearch.org and started looking up this person. His name is Roy E. Shomer and he is my great grandfather. My grandma B's father. It looked like there was a sealing that needed to be performed and there were also a lot of other work that I needed to do from his line. As I thought about doing this person's sealing, I remembered back when we adopted Nora and I felt like my Grandma K was helping us on the other side to be able to adopt Nora. Right after this thought came to my mind, I felt like I was encircled about with love, the Spirit, Heavenly angels, I guess you could say. I can't exactly explain the feeling, but it was as if I was encircled about by angels and I felt that is was Roy Shomer and descendants from that side of the family that filled my heart with so much love. The feelings that came to my heart was, "We are here for you too." The spirit was so strong that I started to hyperventilate a little and to sob. This feeling lasted for at least 5 minutes. Ron came upstairs so we could pray before he left for work and I began to tell him what just happened. The spirit was still so strong that I just sobbed as I told him. I didn't want this feeling to leave and so I didn't even turn on the tv for the rest of my run. I just continued to thank Heavenly Father for thy mercies and this experience. I realized that from this experience, The atonement is real. I needed to feel the spirit and I was so scared that I had offended the spirit and wouldn't be able to feel the spirit for a while, but I know that the atonement is real. Repentance works, and we can be forgiven. I know this because I felt the spirit again shortly after repenting. My testimony of prayer was strengthened. I had been praying to feel the spirit and prayed to know "What mercies had He bestowed upon me?" He answered with something that is more than I ever imagined.
He has bestowed so many mercies upon me and just when I don't know what else I could do to bring Gemma and Eli home, Heavenly Father blesses me with His grace and mercy. He shows me that I have many Heavenly angels looking out for me and helping us to bring the babies home. We are not alone. When Heavenly Father blesses us with His grace, He blesses us with Heavenly help. Not only has He blessed us with earthly angels, such as Steph and Nick, but He has blessed us with Heavenly angels as well. I felt them as sure as I have felt anything tangible. After this experience, I had the desire to do the family lines work. I texted Stephanie and asked her to find a specific woman andshe found this person, as well as a lot of other family members. The hearts of the children shall be turned to their father's and the hearts of the father's shall turn to their father's.
Here are a few of the things that came to mind.....
- Genesha contacting us
-Finding Jay
-Getting to be with the twins for a week in Pa
-Words spoken with Genesha at Jay's office
-Getting flights home so quickly
-My kids and ron at the airport
-Jay calling and finding a way to terminate Keffe's rights
- Steph and Nick
-Easing the concerns and tensions of Genesha
-Statute appealed
-Ron seeing the twins and spending the day with the Corfee family
-Steph and Nick deciding to care for the twins for 2 more weeks
- Easing Genesha's worries
I then started to think about how Ron and I needed to go on a date night and that we should go to the temple tomorrow. I remembered that Stephanie had given me a name back and I started to wonder if we could do a sealing tomorrow. I logged in to FamilySearch.org and started looking up this person. His name is Roy E. Shomer and he is my great grandfather. My grandma B's father. It looked like there was a sealing that needed to be performed and there were also a lot of other work that I needed to do from his line. As I thought about doing this person's sealing, I remembered back when we adopted Nora and I felt like my Grandma K was helping us on the other side to be able to adopt Nora. Right after this thought came to my mind, I felt like I was encircled about with love, the Spirit, Heavenly angels, I guess you could say. I can't exactly explain the feeling, but it was as if I was encircled about by angels and I felt that is was Roy Shomer and descendants from that side of the family that filled my heart with so much love. The feelings that came to my heart was, "We are here for you too." The spirit was so strong that I started to hyperventilate a little and to sob. This feeling lasted for at least 5 minutes. Ron came upstairs so we could pray before he left for work and I began to tell him what just happened. The spirit was still so strong that I just sobbed as I told him. I didn't want this feeling to leave and so I didn't even turn on the tv for the rest of my run. I just continued to thank Heavenly Father for thy mercies and this experience. I realized that from this experience, The atonement is real. I needed to feel the spirit and I was so scared that I had offended the spirit and wouldn't be able to feel the spirit for a while, but I know that the atonement is real. Repentance works, and we can be forgiven. I know this because I felt the spirit again shortly after repenting. My testimony of prayer was strengthened. I had been praying to feel the spirit and prayed to know "What mercies had He bestowed upon me?" He answered with something that is more than I ever imagined.
He has bestowed so many mercies upon me and just when I don't know what else I could do to bring Gemma and Eli home, Heavenly Father blesses me with His grace and mercy. He shows me that I have many Heavenly angels looking out for me and helping us to bring the babies home. We are not alone. When Heavenly Father blesses us with His grace, He blesses us with Heavenly help. Not only has He blessed us with earthly angels, such as Steph and Nick, but He has blessed us with Heavenly angels as well. I felt them as sure as I have felt anything tangible. After this experience, I had the desire to do the family lines work. I texted Stephanie and asked her to find a specific woman andshe found this person, as well as a lot of other family members. The hearts of the children shall be turned to their father's and the hearts of the father's shall turn to their father's.
Sunday, January 1, 2017
adoption update
Continuing on.....
That month of December was wonderful because it was Christmas time, but also very difficult. Although, I love December and was enjoying all of the holiday festivities, I had so much anxiety. I started to analyze everything I said and did. I started to think that if I did not say and do everything perfectly, this adoption would fall through. I started thinking that my works were not enough. Finally, one day, I was on the treadmill, and was reading in Ether 12. I realized that I always pray that the birth mother would be filled with grace. That strengthening and enabling power to do what she could not do on her own. I knew that placing a child for adoption is one of the most difficult things you can ever do, but something that I realized during this past month is that I need our Savior's grace more than ever. This adoption was not brought about because of my perfect works, for I can't do enough to earn the right to be the twins mother, but this adoption was brought about because of a loving Heavenly Father. He knew that these twins belonged in our family and He brought Genesha and our family together. It seemed like very shortly after I felt the spirit and these truths were felt in my heart, I was able to let go of a lot of the anxiety that I felt about trying to be the perfect adoptive mother ALL THE TIME and always saying and doing the perfect thing. It seemed like my insecurities left and I was filled with faith and confidence again. I can't even explain how much I needed to feel our Heavenly Father's love and confidence throughout this past month. He has given me the strength and patience to keep moving forward having faith in Him.
That month of December was wonderful because it was Christmas time, but also very difficult. Although, I love December and was enjoying all of the holiday festivities, I had so much anxiety. I started to analyze everything I said and did. I started to think that if I did not say and do everything perfectly, this adoption would fall through. I started thinking that my works were not enough. Finally, one day, I was on the treadmill, and was reading in Ether 12. I realized that I always pray that the birth mother would be filled with grace. That strengthening and enabling power to do what she could not do on her own. I knew that placing a child for adoption is one of the most difficult things you can ever do, but something that I realized during this past month is that I need our Savior's grace more than ever. This adoption was not brought about because of my perfect works, for I can't do enough to earn the right to be the twins mother, but this adoption was brought about because of a loving Heavenly Father. He knew that these twins belonged in our family and He brought Genesha and our family together. It seemed like very shortly after I felt the spirit and these truths were felt in my heart, I was able to let go of a lot of the anxiety that I felt about trying to be the perfect adoptive mother ALL THE TIME and always saying and doing the perfect thing. It seemed like my insecurities left and I was filled with faith and confidence again. I can't even explain how much I needed to feel our Heavenly Father's love and confidence throughout this past month. He has given me the strength and patience to keep moving forward having faith in Him.
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